this is the story of the 16 hours that turned them to rubble...

32

-divorced with an MBA

-handles large, multinational sales accounts for a software company

-attended law school & a PHD program

-brilliant at chess & other games

-has started 2 successful companies on the side

Quotes: "i really am surprised at how wussy i am with kids. i imagine you must get better at it. still i am disappointed. i thought it would be like no big deal."

"driving in the car is the best! in 5 minutes they pass out & then I just want to go sit in the quiet garage & go to my happy place."

"the whole time they were eating I just couldn't stop thinking, 'crap! now they are going to have to poop!'"

"It feels so good to have you guys back & know that their lives aren't in my hands anymore."

27

-just completed 3 months of boot camp & 1 month of combat training

-can low crawl half a mile through the hot sand in 100 degrees wearing flak & kevlar while carrying an M-16 & drawing 30 lb water jugs under barbed wire

-accustomed to long weight-bearing hikes and grueling 16 hour working days designed to test as well as overload one's physical, mental and psychological bearing.

Quotes: "what the training didn't prepare me for was 28 hours with ben & denae's kids"

"I slept for 4 hours at the beach & woke up still exhausted"

"The kids went to bed & we just sat there & stared. watching 'jersey shore' was too much thinking for us."

as mentioned in previous posts, ben's brother paul loves our kids & they love him. he comes to visit at least once a month to play & surf. so when brainstorming how to get us to new mexico for a wedding (post to come), he was more than willing & excited to take a weekend & be a pseudo dad for us. really we have heard for weeks how excited he is for this. alright, go for it buddy.

i hope i can do this justice.

FRIDAY

1:30pm- we leave as they all play quietly in their room.

5:30pm- things are fairly smooth with the exception that taj was too embarrassed to ask uncle paul to go potty & just wet himself at the beach instead. whoops.

8:30pm- kids are asleep & paul's voice has a slight tremor. he is shocked by their nonstop energy & humongous appetites. apparently a medium pizza was not enough for all of them & paul got the short stick. he is confused as to how he is supposed to go to sleep to just to start all over in the morning

SATURDAY

9:32am- no answer

10:01am- no answer

10:38am- no answer

Mind you this has not even been 24 hours

the following are texts that we received from uncle paul in succession shortly thereafter.

11:45am- Lotus likes hummus. Ehhhh

12:50pm- I have a whole new respect for you guys

1:01pm- they are dirty n they poop n they call your name 5,000 times a day

1:06pm- when lisa comes over i'm gonna run n get a vasectomy

2:25pm- googled tranquilizer

not sure what exactly has transpired, but it is around this time that cousin haley, who is in the marine corps station about 2 hours away, shows up on the back of motorcycle to save catatonic paul. she now takes over to run the show.

9:34pm- i applaud both of you.

SUNDAY

9:53am- by the way, just so you know, a small tornado hit your house. what's your eta?

10:14am- their day starts early

texts from haley:

4:05pm- do you call 911 for kids too or is there a special number?

4:06pm- so say, theoretically, if you were to leave taj at the beach... would he be able to find his way home?

4:06pm- seriously, do you think he'd take the main roads or the side roads?

8:47pm- we return home to both of them looking more than ragged as they sit amongst the filth. the kids are "asleep" in their room. door is secured from the outside with a handy cleverly engineered 2 way locking system (Walmart $8) small hands are poking things underneath the door.

Monday morning Paul comes out of his bedroom discussing his flight home Tuesday morning & Haley is wondering how she is getting home asap. No plans for either to visit again any time soon. Both are currently being treated for PTSD.